Ashanti joined her younger sister, Kenashia “Shia” Douglas, and their mother, Tina Douglas, on “Red Table Talk” to open up about the domestic violence Shia went through with her abusive ex-fiancé, and how it affected their entire family. See their gut-wrenching interview inside…
WARNING: This post contains explicit violence, which could be triggering to survivors.
Last month, Ashanti took to social media during Domestic Violence Awareness Month to praise her younger sister, Shia Douglas, for getting out of an abusive relationship after years of enduring abuse. The post featured pictures of her sister’s bruised and bloody body parts, which were the same photos Shia shared herself in an extremely disturbing and vulnerable IG post about being horrifically abused at the hands of her ex-fiancé.
On her 32nd birthday in 2020, Shia revealed that she was involved in a violent relationship with her ex-fiancé, Slow Bucks. She put up an Instagram post with photos and videos of her battered face, sharing how her teeth were knocked out by a man she once fell madly in love with and clips of her reconstruction surgery on her mouth and jaw. Since then, Shia has been a domestic violence advocate, speaking out about how she’s on a journey to heal from her past and all of the trauma she has endured.
For a new episode of “Red Table Talk,” Grammy-winning artist Ashanti joined her sister Shia and their mother, Tina Douglas, to talk about how Shia’s domestic violence situation impacted their family, which they called the “darkest time of their lives.”
During the discussion, Shia bravely detailed the abuse, sharing how her abuser gave her black eyes and knocked her teeth out. Shia shared how her abuser would manipulate her family into thinking she was the one starting these toxic arguments when, in fact, he was the one wreaking havoc in their home. She explained why she shared a clip from a heated argument they had after he had strangled her, causing her mother to tear up.
The former couple met when Shia was a freshman in college, and they were together for 13 years. She said the physical abuse didn’t begin until almost a decade into their relationship, but she suffered mental, verbal, and emotional abuse from him up until then.
“Over time, it’s almost like someone is chipping away. You begin to question yourself and second-guess,” Shia said.
The stress and abuse led to her having a miscarriage at four months of pregnancy.
As the big sister, Ashanti wanted to take matters into her own hands to defend her sister after her sister’s abuser began stalking her. Even after he broke her teeth, he tried to continue to reach out.
“There were times after he broke my teeth that he did continue to try and reach out. He did continue to try to come around and come with gifts. He manipulated a lot of things between us as a family,” Shia said. ”There were times where he would show up if I were to post where I was to Instagram. There were times where I was on my best friend’s bed sleeping and he was literally in the window taking pictures of me and sending pictures to my phone,” she described.
“I was like ‘Oh, nah,” Ashanti said. “I went into the garage, I got the bat. I pulled up in the truck. I had vaseline. I was ready. I was by myself, I had the adrenaline, you know what I mean?”
At the end, Ashanti also talked about the women who Shia’s abuser was also messing around with and how they “taunted” her online, posting pictures of themselves pointing to their teeth while smiling. There were also mutual friends who “were picking sides.”
”As a black women, when you’re kicking someone when she’s down, that’s the most disgraceful, disgusting thing,” Ashanti said. “Whatever the situation was with these females and him…whatever. That kind of disrespect is so vile. It’s harmful even mentally. It’s triggering,” Ashanti said. “How can you laugh at someone or make fun of somebody that’s going through stuff like that?”
”I feel like as black women, we have to learn to support each other better,” Jada reacted.
Shia wanted to make it clear that she’s in a beautiful place, she’s not a victim or a survivor. She said in order to truly heal from the experience, she needed to detach herself from those labels. “This was an experience that taught me. This was an experience that I’ve now risen above. So, you’re taking your power back in that way,” Shia shared.
Whew. This was touching and powerful. Watch the full episode below:
The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers free, confidential help 24/7. Call: 1-800-799*7233 / Chat: thehotline.org
Photo: Facebook Screenshot